past/future

ach. it's no use. my brain is fried. my writing is flat. my inspiration is nil. i almost blew off this blog post, but it's the last one i'll do before the new year. and i can't end the year talking about slacking.

new years -- the equivalent of living simultaneously in the past and future.

does everyone feel the same way right now? a little sad to see the old year passing mixed with a little excited about everything new and fresh that's in store? the weather is even participating. the sky's that exact shade of wintry, crisp nostalgic blue that makes me crave a warm drink and a good hug. (too far, corrie. you've taken the sentimentality too far).

anyway, the other night, fresh off my families visit, i had the urge to clean house. this primarily consisted of dusting and deciding that the box of papers under my bed absolutely needed to be meshed with the box of papers in my closet.

other than proving that sometimes two boxes of papers (especially when you're a writer) are needed, it was an appropriate pre-new years exercise in reflection.

talk about nostalgia? try sorting through a bunch of papers that chronicle the biggest transitional period of your life.

i made this my first year in nyc.
pasted on the inside pages are ticket stubs, letters, photos.
all of them were meant as reminders of the new experiences
i wouldn't have otherwise had if i hadn't chosen to move to nyc. 

among the old cards, ticket stubs, folder of rejection letters, i found two separate new years resolution lists. both of them were made when i lived in Buffalo. one from five years back, another about three years ago.

some might as well have been written by a different corrie. present corrie has no strong urge to study at a prestigious school or learn to ski. but a lot more were surprisingly right on.

dance twice a week? check. become a good, confident writer? the fact that i don't even think this is a to-do means, check. it gets deeper. learn to differentiate a well-earned relaxation from procrastination or laziness. check check. (erm, did i mention that it's a tradition on my dad's side to make some pretty hard core resolutions?)

there's one main thing i haven't tackled. but maybe this is my year to get published and go on a book tour for my novel. then i'll be all caught up. which leaves me wondering, who do i want to be five years from now? since it appears i'm pretty good with follow through, and since i've already travelled to someplace i've never been (tho there's always more), currently eat vegetables (nearly) every day, and volunteer at a charitable organization, what's next?

but i guess that's the fun of new years and life in general? you can kinda do whatever you want. i'm happy i found these old resolutions. i often feel like nothing changes in my life, meanwhile the corrie of the past has been progressing into someone she's wanted to be this whole time. the possibilities that await are exciting, yet it still makes me sad to see all the things that were and aren't anymore.

which leads me full blog circle to ask, does everyone feel this way this time of year? and can it please just get to January 1 already so all this damn reflection can end? in the meantime....

Happy New Years everyone! wishing you a fulfilling, awe-inspiring, healthy, successful, and super-frickin' happy 2012.

what better way to kick it off than with a little Zooey (are you watching New Girl yet? it's awesome) and an insanely cute Gordon (guy)...

slacking

i've been out of school for years, but i still think of this week between christmas and new years as vacation. it's hard waking up. easy to stay up late watching tv and snacking. SUPER difficult to blog like normal. yesterday i left the house to get myself some bangs, came back, changed back into my pjs and proceeded to spend the day floating from my couch to my bed, reading. the whole time, i kept thinking, whatever. i'm on vacation. it was awesome.

i need one more day off. will post for reals on friday:)

dare yourself

the holidays are almost here people. possibly they already are if you're jewish. but i'm not, so i'm talking christmas. (not like i'm not catholic or christian either, but hey, it's what i grew up celebrating.)

this is the week of pre-holiday drinks with friends. my crit partner (do i need to hyper link her anymore?) and i went to our favorite wine bar and made lists of january "dares" for each other. these are her dares for me.

i'm already 1 out of 3 for her top dare. after months away from it, i went to a new latin club the other night. it's fun trying a new place, because i'm always the only gringa in there. my first time somewhere people are like, "who the heck is that?" by the second time, it's like, "oh sigh. there's that tall blonde chick again." but the first time, booyah! don't ask me why i think this is fun. i must not get enough attention in my day to day.

until i get some health insurance, that skiing dare is a no way (crit partner's trying to organize a ski trip. maybe i'll go and sit in the lodge). but the others? sure, why not. it's fun to not make your own resolutions, but be in the hands of someone that knows you, and see what they'd put you up to. if i were daring myself, it'd be to have only forward looking thoughts for the next few weeks. no more, looking back.

regardless, the rest of the list might need to go on a short hiatus.

my parents are coming in two days. it's my mom's first christmas away from home. ever. mine was last year, and despite missing all my fam and some of my favorite holiday traditions, i loved the experience. this year it will be even better because i get to share it.

so as i head out to do a little grocery shopping i'll leave you with some dance!

my hiphop class was a dare to myself almost two years ago. initially, i was terrible, constantly behind. forgetting choreography every step. this past class my teacher told me that her boyfriend suggested "the blonde with the ponytail teach the class while she's away." dares are good things. regardless of improvement. i'm glad i stuck with it. i wish i could carry my dance class around with me in my pocket. whip nicole and tammy and reggie out when i feel stressed or sad. it fixes everything. and even though i felt cooler dancing this than what the result show -- and oy those roots -- i loved this song (Rihanna), loved this dance.

blogging might be spotty over the next week, but merry holidays everyone! stay warm, be safe and joyous. and maybe dare yourself to _____.

a delightful day followed by...

what is the worst thing about vomiting? when you blow your nose afterwards and then smell vomit for the rest of the night. second worst part about vomiting? vomiting.

let me backtrack....

so yesterday my fabulous crit partner and i decided to get together for a little holiday cheer. we were going to treat ourselves to a fancy lunch at Jean Georges, but cheaped out and decided to eat at Shake Shack instead.

Shake Shack has been on my list of places to eat in NYC ever since i moved here. it's a creation of Danny Meyers who owns a slew of NYC restaurants. the original SS was near the literary agents office i worked at. even in the height of winter there was a line twisting out front. the meat blend of the burgers is top secret. they don't look like much, but they're supposed to be sublime.

and...?

they are. the grease that drips from the burgers is almost the best part.

thus fortified (though ellen with a slightly upset stomach) we continued on our holiday way. this included corrie being indecisive in a few stores and stopping by the Macy's windows.

then it was onward to a great, inexpensive cheese shop in the East Village where i stocked up for my parent's visit next week. Trader Joe's for cheap wine (see previous sentence) and then happy hour!

all sounds good and fun, right? and it was. possibly the only mistake we made was after all this, going out for a second round of burgers. crit partner voted for fondue, but i wasn't sure i could hack it. so we went to an organic burger joint instead on the lower east side.

neither of us could finish. we took the left overs to go and cheerily went on our ways.

the trouble started an hour later.

huh. my stomach feels a little queasy. ten minutes later. huh. now it feels a lot queasy. five minutes later. wow. i've got a pretty bad headache. five minutes later. uh oh.

yesterday was a super day. i went to B&H for the first time ever. it's gotta be the biggest photo and video store in the world. they send products around on wheelie track systems (no that is not the proper wording) that run over your head through the store like Santa's workshop. i had a blast hanging with my crit partner and i even got a little shopping done.

later last night though? um, it frickin' sucked. i dunno if it was the double dose of burgers. or if i managed to catch a bit of the flu from that girl at work who had flu a few days back who i came withing a few yards of, but oy. autumn marches on across my immune system. i can't wait to see what winter has in store.

t'is the season

red-haired sis and i made christmas cookies the other night. whilst i regularly make chocolate chippers, i haven't made christmas cookies in years. a quick online search later, we were recipe ready. and that was about it.

since we were in her neighborhood, we baked at my sister's apartment. while i've never really considered myself a baker, i've come to realize, after baking at sis's, that i am in possession of a quite a few necessary baking items.

like spatulas. baking sheets. hand mixers. baking powder. vanilla. and oh, say, flour.

two loaded shopping bags and twenty dollars later-- minus colored sugar sprinkles which we couldn't find -- we were set to go. have you ever creamed sugar and butter together by hand? it's not the most delightful event. but baking with sis was. it was a truly hand made/rolled/iced/taken off the hot cookie sheet with bare fingers evening. and if you can't tell from this picture

this is the ugly plate of cookies, btw. they got better.

it was frickin' SWEET! we split two cookies and couldn't eat anymore. when i got home that night, even though it was almost midnight, i sauteed and ate some kale. i guess that's what a total of 3 cups of sugar will do to you.

i think we'd probably try a different recipe next time (helllllooooo comments section of this blog) :) but i hope next year when we take on holiday baking the merriment stays the same.

also, meet chia. she's my friend's french bulldog. she's going to be in a patron's dogs calendar for his neighborhood bar.

star-crossed numbers

i found this at Barnes and Noble ....

the back cover should be R and J dead
with lots of people sobbing around them. right?

it led to many questions, like isn't there a better Shakespeare play to use as a counting primer? like i dunno, Twelfth Night, maybe? do we need to prime kids to Shakespeare this early? and by choosing this particular play, aren't we setting them up for a major disappointment when they're older? along the lines of...

awww, Romeo and Juliet, I used to have an old counting book about them...wait, you mean they both die! wtf?!

because, sadly, whilst i was hoping for 9 droughts of swallowed poison. 10 drops of spilled blood. this book kept it clean. it counted musicians, masks, friends (friends?), late night trysts.

erm okay, not late night trysts.

all i'm saying, is if you're going to go for something like this. make it awesome. unless they're saving the subversive one for the second primer in the series. warn the kiddies now, 11 through 20 is wicked fun.



erasing stuck-iness

last week, i helped 826NYC mail holiday cards to their donors.

i began volunteering at 826 almost as soon as i moved to NYC. Dave Eggers, of this fame (please read immediately if you haven't yet), founded the whole venture in one of the most inspiring examples of what a writer can do with his (or her) fame and (mini) fortune. (second most inspiring? Anne Patchett. you go, girl.)

though i was a pretty dedicated 826 volunteer for a few years running, i fell off after a while, only going in now and then to help with special events. i hadn't realized how long i'd been away until i asked the volunteer coordinator how her wedding planning was going and she said, "i'm about to have my one year anniversary."

oops.

then she asked how i was. what was new with me?

and i said...uh...nothing? feeling very much like this little guy:

okay. i'm ready. let's go. when's something going to happen? hey guys. what about me? i'm waiting!

i wasn't upset about it or anything (so no pep talks needed), but Painted Living Room ain't nearly as exciting as Got Married. though it might be more satisfying. omg, i'm kidding.

then two days ago, a dream possibility presented itself.

remember how much i love Radiolab, that sciency-life-changing show on NPR? well, they put out a call for interns! i applied instantly.

now even on the days that customers at work insist the wine is off (it ain't) because they've stayed on that vineyard so they know, i still can't imagine holding down a full-time job while also being a writer. unless it was for Radiolab the tiny voice in my head always parenthesised for me.

i put together a fresh cover letter and found the most updated version of my resume. and it was whilst doing these two things, that i had this thought: hey, not bad, corrie.

i thought i'd pass the experience along. whether i get the internship or not (fingers crossed) the experience of applying for it was ridiculously gratifying. in fact, it's the point of this whole, meandering post.

feeling like that doggy staring at the door?

update your resume. apply for a job, or an internship, or a volunteer position. not interested in doing any of those things, but still feeling like the only thing that's changed in your life recently was the length of your hair? make a life resume. do the last three years and list all the important or not (hello new carpet!) changes in your life. then revel in the satisfaction of how great you are. because though the day to day can start to seem pretty standard. i bet you anything the big picture's been changing the whole time.

oh tannenbaum, indeed

you might have noticed i took two days off from blogging last week. i didn't even do my usual short "busy writing. see you friday." instead, i threw blogging to the wind, drank so much coffee i actually smelled a little funny (or was it funky? only i'll ever know) and FINISHED MY EDITS.

whoop whoop!

completing drafts reminds me why i love writing. the high is ridonkulous. for 48 hours i floated through brooklyn beaming at everyone. oh you woman, taking up the entire sidewalk with a stroller the size of a Hummer not even acknowledging that other people need to pass, isn't life grand?!

yes it is.

now i have a little time before my first reader's reactions, responses and -- der, you forgot all the comma's in this sentence -- edits roll in. time i will use to prep for the holidays.

now if you know me, as um 98% of you do (hi mom!), you know that christmas is not my most favoritist of holidays. HOWEVER, it's starting to grow on me. (it could be some of that left over, draft-completed beaming). this past week, i even bought a christmas tree.

christmas tree shopping in NYC is a little like renting an apartment in NYC. you pay an exorbitant amount for a size that anywhere else in the country would be laughable. for instance, below is pictured the biggest Park Slope tree seller. a Charlie Brown style Christmas tree costs $60 or $70.

this year, they began bundling branches for sale. i didn't ask how much, but i'm thinking they're between $10 and $20. (i hope i'm not offending anyone by naming actual prices. in nyc it's not gauche to ask "how much do you pay..." for just about anything. um, right guys? sez the girl who loves asking how much do you pay for...)

that being said....when my red haired sis and i wandered past a local hardware store and the guy said trees were $25 we jumped on it.

it so happened that the previous day my bro-in-law in Buffalo posted pictures of the tree that he and my sister had picked out. the comparisons made me laugh. ready? here goes....


$25 brooklyn tree:

$45 buffalo tree:

so cute!

brooklyn:

buffalo:

now granted, my lil' sis cuts down her tree, which greatly reduces price, and she has those mega-vaulted ceilings in her great room to play with. but what i love best about these comparisons between buffalo and brooklyn, is the one similarity in them.

notice the smiles that finding the tree resulted in. (granted, we are sisters, thus have similar smiles. and i'm not quite sure mine is the tree as it's kinda just the one that the guy at the hardware store grabbed from the pile)*clears throat and presses on with her point*

conclusion? size does not, in fact, matter when it comes to enjoyment of the, erm, holidays.

and that, my friends, is how you end a post about christmas with some penis humor.